Ant fest

I am SO fed up with the ants which continue to wake me up most nights.  Although the bed doesn’t have any ants when I go to sleep they seem to come during the night and I end up with a lot bites.  As well as not being able to sleep for quite a long time.  As the picture shows, today they managed to get into my nuts.

Today was the first day of working where Selvam and Rajan are taking responsibility for the work.  I found it very difficult and don’t know what my role should be.  Yet I don’t want to go back to being the person who holds it all together.  Its got to turn into a group responsibility somehow.

It rained

Went to see Auroculture today even although when I started I wasn’t sure whether it was going to rain or not.  It started to rain on the way there but I decided to carry on.  Whether I went back home or on to see Auroculture I was going to get wet. So I carried on and saw Auroculture and we had a good chat.

I couldn’t think of a suitable picture so used the one from the same date last year, Sam in the playground.  It was the day before Emma and my birthday party where we celebrated 100 years – 70 from me and 30 from her.

Waiting for rain?

Have got quite a few odd jobs done, one of them being to order two more dresses.  Now washing is taking longer to dry I have to make sure I have enough clothes both to wear and be in the wash. I don’t like having to put on something damp because its all I have got that is clean.

Its been really grey all day and is getting increasingly humid.  Are we waiting for rain as Rajan suggests?? It was a cool night last night so perhaps the temperature is starting to come down.

Filling up

The light in this picture makes it look as if it was taken by moonlight, but in fact it was taken at sunset.  We had quite a bit of rain the other night and the pond is at last starting to properly fill up.

Have spoken with Vivek about developments in Buddha Garden.  Maybe there is a place for me here after all.  Things do have to change though.  We have to see ourselves as growing with the place, not just doing our own thing.  We have to learn how to take responsibility for ourselves, each other and the place. All together.

Work

I feel that it has been a continuous work day today what with farming in the morning, then meeting, then notes of meeting and everything else fitted in around that.

Felt strongly that Buddha Garden needs me to go if it is to move towards the next stage of its development.  Somehow I feel I am impeding the next step of development. But what will I do?

The picture is of the grey sky which seems to be how it is most of the time these days.  Reflecting how I feel.

Udavi

Had our first day of the new school year in Udavi vegetable garden this afternoon.  There were 15 students, all of whom had participated in the doing the vegetable garden last year.  They were really chaotic; there was no one keeping them in order and they seemed to be all over the place.  I told them that they had to decide whether they really wanted to come or not.  Most said ‘yes’ but there were one or two who were undecided.

Despite the chaos, as the picture shows, they tidied up the existing beds really well.  We found space to make three more beds which we will start doing next week.

Half a sukhasana

Had some fun with Spiros, one of our volunteers this morning.  It looked like he was doing half a sukhasana while cleaning the basil ready for Foodlink.

One way of getting your yoga poses done efficiently I suppose.

Ants grrrrrrrr!

Over the weekend I have been very bothered by ants.  The worst is that they have been getting into my bed and waking me up with their crawling and biting in the middle of the night.  This morning I put my mattress into the sun and realised that the material is falling apart.  The stuffing is coming out and of course it makes a perfect ants nest.

But they also go all over my computer desk and as the picture shows, into my water jug.  I feel horrible; its very hot and humid so I feel sweaty and my skin crawls.  Ugh!

Sun and shadows

This is a picture I took yesterday of the sun and shadows in our little patch of woodland. 

Its beautiful.

Stabilising myself

Today I have been back here one week and last night for the first time felt ready to fall asleep when I went to bed. Have worked quite hard today on writing up and making arrangements for our new education activities with three schools. This made me realise that my body still has more adjusting to do before it is completely in tune with the rhythms here.

This morning I packed up my travelling bags while wondering when I will be getting them out to go traveling again.

Daughters and grandchildren

This is a picture I made today for my computer.  Then I can look at them every day.

Amazing work

We have about 14 people coming to help with the farm work in the mornings. Now we have four people who know what they are doing, as well as me, it means a lot more work gets done.

Rajan is planning to move into Buddha Garden with his family next week.  I think it will bring a huge amount of energy to the place, which is really needed.

Boring posters

Have spent quite some time today doing some rather boring, but very necessary, posters for Buddha Garden.

Despite all the work that has gone into them I seriously doubt whether many people will take notice of or act on what they say.  That’s my experience at the moment with other posters I have put up.

Taking up the reins again

Got up in time to work this morning and feel myself gradually getting involved with and becoming part of the flow here again.  We had a meeting this morning where we sorted out who is going to be responsible for looking after all the people who come in to Buddha Garden.  It means making more posters and having a rota for being responsible on different days.  We are also going to take it in turns to do the Sunday watering which will be nice for me.  Vivek and I made some plans for the new land.

Now I feel very tired.

Independence day

This is a picture that Lucille did for me when I was in the UK.  I don’t know where she found out how to draw and colour the Indian flag.

Another very quiet day when I took some chocolate from the UK to my friend Auroculture.  And still couldn’t think of a solution to the building problem.

Very quiet

A very quiet day when I have had plenty of time to think about how the buildings are going to be used.  Rajan and his family want to become Newcomers and move into Buddha Garden but there is no obvious spare space for them.  Had a long talk with Vivek about various possibilities, one of which is to modify the dormitory and office space. 

I cannot see how I can manage all the volunteers without a dormitory.  Have not come to any conclusions about this.

Back

The picture is of Heathrow airport where the queue for the plane became a throng when we finally got the message that we could get on the plane.

I am now back and have the strongest feeling I have ever had that this is where I should be.  There are no ecstatic feelings or anything – quite the reverse - just a strong knowing.  This despite the emotional feelings of missing by daughters and the grandchildren. 

Journey starts

After a dreadful night’s sleep, or rather non sleep, Rachael and I went to the airport early in the morning.  Apart from the being asked about my visa (I was told ‘we’ve never seen one like this before’ and ‘we have to check otherwise the airline gets fined’) everything went OK. 

Spent an hour or two juicing up my tablet at Heathrow.  Poor Rachael had to wait six hours for her late plane to go.  At Manchester it seems there were no charging stations so she spent a lot of the time in Costa using one of their plugs.  She got to America only to find that her flight there had also been delayed.

A family meal

Rachael has joined me and tomorrow we will be going to the airport together.  She will go to America and I will go to Heathrow and then India.

We had a lovely meal together this evening.  I feel excited to be going back.

We are just shadows

Managed to get to Stoke for the second time this holiday to see Jean and Bob.  Jean is home from hospital but has been told that she has infections in her lungs and heart.  As she is allergic to penicillin it seems there is little that can be done.  She is in pain and sleeps a lot.

It was an emotional goodbye.

I feel the picture somehow expresses how we are but a shadow on the earth.

To the airport for fun

Went with Emma and co to the airport to watch the planes take off and land.  There were also lots of other things for children to do.  I really enjoyed myself but got very cold at times as there was a keen wind.

Sam got home really tired!

Home day

Had a lovely day at home with Emma, Sam and Elsie.

Spent some time in the garden and loved Elsie’s tiger suit. We put it on her to keep warm in what felt like a cooler, almost Autumn day.

To Halifax

Went to Halifax to see my brother and had a lovely lunch at an unusual lunch place.  All the food was stir fry and you choose what you wanted in it from a very wide range of fresh ingredients.  It was cooked very theatrically with lots of flames, hissing and crackling during the cooking process.

Had a lovely walk up one of the major roads in Manchester early in the morning.  Loved the Victorian iron work on Victoria station.

Back to Manchester

Went back to Manchester from Sheffield on a very crowded train this morning. 

Had a nice if somewhat frantic afternoon with Sam, Elsie and Emma.  A neighbours little boy came into play with Sam and hence the frantic energy as he’s not used to playing with other children.

A day to relax

Finished off the second dress this morning and am pleased with the result.  We walked to the sorting office to collect a parcel of mine which they hadn’t been able to deliver.  We went a back way that was much quieter and greener than the main road and wasn’t quite so hilly.  We had lunch at lovely Heely City farm which I always enjoy because of the atmosphere.

Had a very quiet afternoon while Rachael went out to see friends.  The cat in the picture may or may not have decided to come and live with Rachael.  It has a collar but seems very thin and yowls pitifully for food.  Yet after spending several days here we haven’t seen her today.

Stiff with sewing!

Have sweated over a hot machine all day to almost get the second dress finished.  I am not quite so happy with the fit as the last one but I think it is OK.  I feel SO stiff.

In the evening had a good walk to a Chinese restaurant which helped me loosen up a bit.

Busy sewing day

This morning went on a shopping trip which included walking to a shop called Dunelm.  Going up the hill reminded me that Sheffield is built on hills and if you are not walking up then you are walking down.  We then went to the city centre to buy the above material.

As well as making a start on the new dress I turned up the door curtain and re-lined Lesley’s bag.  Phew! 

Dress finished!

Everyone pleased with the final result of the dress making.

Now on to the next one!

New dress

Went into Sheffield city centre to the Moor Market to buy material for the first dress I am making for Rachael.

Am very pleased with how far I have got.  I am enjoying sewing again on Matilda’s little machine.

Family day

All the family gathered together at Amanda’s this afternoon.  It was lovely.

Came back with Rachael sitting on the floor of the corridor on the train because it was so full.  Just like India!

With Jean and Bob

At last managed to get to see Jean and Bob in Stoke on Trent today.  After taking Bob out to lunch we went to get Jean out of hospital.  She had been in there for three days getting intravenous antibiotics for a kidney infection.

It had been a stressful time for her and she was SO pleased to get home.  Had a lovely conversation with both of them and came away feeling very close to the Auroville spirit.