A blog to keep me in touch with the visual side of myself. Every day I post something about my life in Buddha Garden, a farm in Auroville, South India
Thursday, 31 December 2015
We in Buddha Garden
Pierre and I had a session
together with Jo. It was really amazing
and gave us both an insight into what is going on between us. At the end she did a reading to see what the
universe thought about the situation.
Pierre got ‘the fool’ and I got ‘the wheel of fortune’. It really is
spot on – me turning the wheel and taking care of things, Pierre jumping into
whatever is his latest adventure.
This is the picture I created to
express this. I feel this insight has changed
things between us for the better.
At peace
Kim’s brother is leaving India
tomorrow. I spoke to him today and he
told me that he feels he understands a lot more about what happened to Kim and
why she died. He is going to pass all
that on to her daughter.
I felt very strongly that Kim is
now at peace and I feel more peaceful about her death. Buddha Garden was, I think, a place that had
given her many positive things and which she may even have come to love.
Sunday, 27 December 2015
Good news
At last I found time to go and
get my hair cut. About time as it was
driving me crazy getting in my eyes and making them itch. We decided I had left
it too long, probably because of the rain.
Good news that my test came back
that everything is OK. Now I can start
treatment for the prolapse that will take about two weeks.
Christmas day!
This morning we spent time in the
stone circle making this mandala. And
planting trees in memory of Kim. Her
brother, who came from China, was with us.
It was a very peaceful day. I couldn’t help remembering how bad I felt
last year. And feeling more than ever
that I had somehow tapped in to how Kim was feeling. Both her brother and I
feel that she has achieved some peace now.
Thursday, 24 December 2015
Taming the jungle
Did an amazing morning’s work
this morning getting rid of the jungle that Le Jardin orchard had become after
all that rain. This picture shows a corner
of the finished work with the grass and glyricidea cut and the trees mulched.
Wasn’t so pleased this afternoon
when the electricity went off unexpectedly just as I was in the middle of doing
online work. Someone had let a worker
use a welding machine! Anyone with half
a brain cell knows that welding takes a lot of power and that the solar system
probably wouldn’t have enough power. It
really screwed up what I was doing. It
feels very difficult to get anything done at the moment.
Feeling defeated
Feeling really defeated after
another difficult conversation. I feel that the person I work with doesn’t
share my vision. Which wouldn’t matter
if he was willing to go and manifest his own vision somewhere else. But he seems to think that Buddha Garden
should change.
I feel I have lost confidence in
myself and my ability to attract people who share my vision. But maybe this
vision isn’t appropriate any more in the present reality.
Yet we created a new garden in
the Visitors Centre.
Christmas balloon
Very happy to hear from several
people that various presents have arrived safely. I love this picture of Sam with his balloon
which apparently he really loves. It
seems that the weight came off the string at one point and the balloon got
stuck on the ceiling. They had to wait
until Tom came back to rescue it as Emma wasn’t tall enough to get it.
The Pryog orchard started today
with the putting up of the information boards.
It felt a wonderful thing to happen at this time of the Solstice.
A very challenging day
Rajan didn’t come to work today
because of problems at home. Fortunately
there was someone to help with the watering otherwise I don’t know how I would
have managed. People turned up for a tour of the farm and it would have been
almost impossible to do the two things together.
Then this afternoon two people
turned up just as I was going to ballet class.
So I had to miss it and was very upset.
I feel I really need these classes if I am to deal with the challenges
of living and working here.
I took this picture first thing
this morning. I loved the sparkle on the
string from the rising sun.
Sunday, 20 December 2015
Passage to India
This is a picture that an artist
friend of mine sent to me today. He has
been diagnosed with cancer and is going into hospital tomorrow. Despite that I feel that he has tapped into
colours which are full of hope.
Once again I have to remind
myself that its where I am meant to be! Sometimes
I just want to run away.
Another job
Again I am finding it difficult
to find time to do everything that needs doing.
And today we got another job to add to the list, although I am very
pleased about it.
There is an area of the Visitors
Centre where they used to have a vegetable garden. I saw the person in charge today and she said
we can plant it this year. It will be a
wonderful focus for all the information we have about Buddha Garden.
But of course it is one more job
to do.
Friday, 18 December 2015
Why?
I made this picture very quickly
in the few minutes I had spare before I went to see a friend. I didn’t think as I did it but it does
express very well how I see my situation here.
Why is it like this?
I see that to deal with this
situation creatively I must not push it away.
In fact I have to embrace it and find ways to manage the energy of
it. Which means looking after myself.
Saw the doctor to get a test
done. Things are looking positive about
the treatment. Provided the test is OK
then I can have treatment that doesn’t involve and operation and see how that
works. It should clear up a lot of my
symptoms.
Wednesday, 16 December 2015
Moving forward?
The picture is one of twelve
posters I made today for the new Pryog orchard.
I am so pleased I have finished them.
Hopefully they will be ready to put up by the weekend.
I am pleased how everything is
coming together but at the same time I feel I am left to deal with everything
on my own. This morning Vivek has had to
go to Delhi to see his brother who is very sick. Pierre thinks that the
problems we had are all in my head and he only seems interested in doing
anything connected with ‘his’ part of the land. A few days ago Rajan needed
time off because his son had a fever and they had to go to the hospital.
I am seeing the doctor tomorrow
for tests. I hope they don’t show
anything that means I have got to leave Buddha Garden as well…..
Sooooooo busy
Have been on the go all day first
with a meeting in the morning and then a presentation in the afternoon. I wrote up the notes to the morning
meeting. Then had to concentrate and
interact a lot with the people in the presentation – although Jeff and Vivek
did the actual narrative. I don’t feel I
have had hardly a minute to myself.
My bladder has not been feeling
good today. I can’t help but feel
because I got pissed off at the morning meeting! I feel so out of tune with so
many of the people there. Yet there are some
very exciting things starting to happen in Buddha Garden. The picture is of some amla that are nearly ready for picking and reminds me why I do choose this life. To grow food and myself.
My heart
I’ve wanted this picture of a
Ramphal for a while as I need it for the seasonal food poster I am making. So I was really pleased to see this growing
in the Pryog orchard when we worked there this morning.
I just love its heart shape and
its juiciness. Which is not the
juiciness of the fruit but the juiciness of love.
Sunday, 13 December 2015
Ups and downs
I had a lot of work that I needed
to do today. As next week is going to be
very busy and I don’t think I will have too much time to sit in front of my
computer. A lot of work has involved
creating posters to re-do the notice board and put around the farm. This picture is of the poster that gave me
the most trouble. I half did it and then
lost the file….. I have also had technical difficulties with my camera that
didn’t work for a lot of the day.
One good thing was that I found a
whole file of information to put on posters around the farm. That will save me having to write it all
again.
Custard apples
Today has been a very busy day
when I didn’t get to my computer until 4.00pm.
The rest of the time I was talking to people and running around to
various parts of Auroville. I took this picture for a poster about eating seasonal food. Its going to be part of a presentation to the community about farming which has been taking up a lot of my time.
I finally went to see a doctor
about my health issues and it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I feel I
can communicate with him and that he will listen. An operation was discussed but I can start
off with more conservative treatment and see how that
One shoe off and one shoe on
I dreamed last night of walking
through a productive forest with one shoe off and one shoe on. When I went out to work this morning I
suddenly realised I was missing a shoe.
The one on the left foot, just as in the dream.
After that dream I woke up
feeling rested and better in my body than I have for some time. I think the dream was telling me about my
connection with the earth and how important that is to me.
Monday, 7 December 2015
Clearing and creating
This picture shows the side of
the Pryog orchard. It has been turned
from a jungle into a beautifully cleared area between it and Le Jardin. Part of the clearing up and creating of a new
orchard.
Has been a very up and down
day. I am finding the mud rather
tiresome. My ailments seem to be upsetting me more than usual – although the
ballet class really helped with that. I got upset with someone I work with when
really I should be able to deal with that now.
Despite all that I managed to overcome
my negative feelings about seeing a doctor. I made an appointment for Wednesday
afternoon. I feel quite positive that there will be a solution to my physical
problems.
Sunday, 6 December 2015
Flowers
Rajan brought me this twig from
one of our trees a few days ago. It had
one open flower but now there are more.
They are really beautiful and I would love to know the name of the tree.
Then I can work out the meaning of the flower.
It was surprisingly difficult to
photograph. They move in the slightest breeze and it was difficult to get a
picture that showed both the shape, colour and bud. I have much more appreciation now of those
that take good photos of flowers!
Big puddle
As this picture shows, the end
isn’t in sight just yet. This is the
huge puddle across the road into Buddha Garden through Siddhartha farm.
According to the weather maps
rainy weather is going to be hanging around for quite a few more days. At least it’s a bit brighter now and we do
have a little bit of sun. And the rain comes in showers rather than all the
time. It is still very soggy though.
Mud glorious mud
It stopped raining last night and
the silence was deafening! This morning we were able to get out and work in the
new Pryog orchard. Very pleased with
what we achieved.
This afternoon it rained again…….
It is hard to remember that this has been going on for only three days. My whole universe seems to have shrunk. All I seem to think about is how to get
through the next rainy day.
More rain
Another day of almost continuous
rain. There is severe flooding in parts
of Tamil Nadu and especially Chennai.
The airport was closed for a time. While there is quite a lot of
flooding in Buddha Garden, it does ease a bit when the rain falls less heavily.
Went to a meeting on the back of
Vivek’s bike. Felt even more battered by the rain than when I am cycling. At least when I am cycling I keep warm.
Rain
I took this picture first thing
in the morning when it was very dim and the entrance to Buddha Garden was
flooded. It has rained all day with only
very short breaks. The water receded
during the day but it is still raining as I write this in the evening. I cannot imagine where all the water is going
to go.
I feel very soggy. This weather seems to be exacerbating my
bladder problems.
Cycling through the rain
Today I had to cycle through the rain to get home after my
ballet class. I hope it doesn’t make all
my various ailments worse. Didn't manage to do a picture.
So far everything seems OK.
Sunday, 29 November 2015
Doodle
Heavy rain today – I think it’s the third Sunday in a row
when this has happened. At least this
time we have had some sun and bright skies from time to time. Although I am finding the damp and humidity
uncomfortable.
Got a lot of things done but had no inspiration for a
picture. Except this doodle drew itself. I like the colours.
Possibilities
Today Vivek came to me with some
ideas for courses. This will be wider
than anything we have done before. It
will focus not only on food growing but food processing and eating. We will be looking at issues that are
relevant to the whole world. We will
getting more people from Auroville involved.
It is very exciting and I feel
that Buddha Garden is now pregnant with many possibilities. When I went to look at what Pierre has been
up to on the piece of land he looks after, there were blue patches of sky
showing through the clouds. I felt more
positive than I have for a very long time.
Worked hard
After two meetings I came home
this afternoon and packed up the advent calendar for the Stanley Duke sprogs. I
now feel really tired. Hopefully I can
send both calendars off tomorrow.
But we have had sun and a blue
sky. With everything seemingly drying up very quickly. And as the picture
shows, we planted the first significant amounts of lettuce.
I tried!
Today I tried to send the above
parcel to Sam. As its an Advent Calendar
I wanted it to arrive by December 1st and although I am later sending
it off that I would like, I thought it had a sporting chance of getting there
on time.
Unfortunately it was not to
be. The power was off and so there were
no computers. Then I found out that
tomorrow is a holiday. So the first day
I can send it is Thursday. Something
exceptional will have to happen for it to get there on time. Oh well….
As I went out I tripped over this
enormous generator. I presume it wasn’t
working because there was no diesel. I wonder who forgot……
Monday, 23 November 2015
Feeling a bit better
After a long and heavy sleep I
woke up feeling hot and lot better.
First time for a few days that I feel I have had some energy. Did a lot
of different jobs including web site articles. I didn't manage to make it to ballet class. Now it is coming towards the end
of the day I am feeling tired again. I
probably need another early night.
It was lovely in the garden this
morning with Pierre, Rajan and Vivek all there as well as me! The picture shows
a group of people in the nursery.
Lettuce season has started and they were pricking out seedlings. We have promised 2500 of them to various
other farmers. So we need a lot of people to do this work.
Sunday, 22 November 2015
Another dark Sunday
It was another dark Sunday and has
rained for most of the day. Everything is now exceptionally soggy with flooding
everywhere. Felt very tired this morning
but feel a bit better this afternoon after lying around and reading.
I seem to have several low level
infections….. as well as emotional stuff to deal with. It feels like the darkness seeps into my body.
Friday, 20 November 2015
The work goes on
My body mirrored my inner
feelings today. I have been feeling quite agitated and I seem to have a ‘not
quite an infection’ in my bladder. Feels
uncomfortable but not really a full blown illness. Like the sinus pain I had when I came back
from the UK.
I am dealing with a lot of
disparate things. Which includes the weather which isn’t the easiest at the
moment. I sorted out something with one of my co-workers two days ago. It seems to take a lot of my energy just to
hold the energy in Buddha Garden. Then there is a long list of other things
that I am doing. My yoga practice seems
to be uncovering how much energy I am expending rather than giving me energy.
Yet the work goes on and
everything seems to be thriving. I need
to look after myself.
Wednesday, 18 November 2015
Too busy busy
Had a very busy day today with a
meeting and then yoga. Unfortunately
after yoga I didn’t feel like doing anything! So I wasn’t able to make a start
on the notes.
Didn’t have time or energy to
create a picture. Not even a photo. So its just a blank.
Monday, 16 November 2015
Flooding
Today it was extremely wet and
soggy. As I write this just after lunch
the sun has come out, so hopefully there will be electricity this evening.
I took this picture
yesterday. I haven’t seen the guava
patch flooded like this for years.
Although most of the water has disappeared today. David said it rained 54mm yesterday.
Rain
It started raining very early
this morning and has been raining all day almost without a break. Its been so dark that the electricity has
been off for most of the day.
Have managed to sew a bit of the
Christmas tree decoration I am making. I
wanted to finish off Sam’s Advent Calendar but it so wet and humid the paper
was too damp to do it.
Dark and rainy
Been dark and rainy and the
electricity has gone off early. So have
spent the time doing Sam’s Advent Calendar and rather enjoying myself.
One of the things I am sending
him his a sachet of citronella. I took this picture of the lemon grass outside
my door. So that he can understand where
it comes from.
Thursday, 12 November 2015
Be true to what is
This morning we had to shore up a
lot of the banana trees around the tank.
They had been blown around in the wind of the cyclone. In doing the the sticks doing the shoring up came down onto the
path. We had to block the path so people don't trip over them, especially at night. I
like the way that the way around is very near.
Wednesday, 11 November 2015
Sun glorious sun!
It was lovely to see the sun
today. Its only been a few grey days but I miss the sun so much when it isn’t
here.
After the cyclone everything was
a mess, but most of it has been cleared up.
The temperature has gone down so we can now germinate lettuces easily. Already
we have some people asking about seedlings.
Pierre told me that he wants
three months off. Which means I will be
on my own working with volunteers in the mornings.
Tuesday, 10 November 2015
Ponds full
Today is Diwali so a day
off. I have been trying out some new
editing software which gave me a horrible surprise. According to the software two thirds of the
sentences I write are too difficult to read easily. And I use far too much passive voice. I changed everything but it doesn’t feel like
my writing any more. I will be interested
to see what my editor thinks.
It was much brighter today so we
have had some electricity. I have
managed to charge up all my devices. I
hope there will be enough left for proper light tonight.
Cyclone
Today it rained all day with
strong gusts of wind. It was dark and
cold. The solar system didn’t produce much electricity
so there was hardly any light in the evening.
We are told that a cyclone is passing over tonight. But it feels more like it came over today.
We have had quite a few trees and
branches blown down. This is what the ladies finger bed looked like afterwards.
Sunday, 8 November 2015
Wet
It has been a proper monsoon day
today, raining almost continuously and very dark and cold. Despite using as
little power as possible I wonder if the electricity will last all night…..
I should have taken the opportunity to do my
book, but although I did some, I didn’t feel like doing much. I did manage to get all the things together
for Sam’s Advent Calendar though and am rather pleased with the result.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)