Empty 20190928

Had a long sleep this afternoon but still feel very tired. Tried to do the back cover of the book today using the above photo of moss that I took on one of my cycle rides to or from Buddha Garden.  It’s the last job and I really wanted to finish it but just couldn’t. 

I feel completely empty.

Onward 20190927

Went and saw my friend in the archives who has given me a lot of material for the next report.  About green work in Auroville.  For the next two weeks I will just gently read stuff.

Started to get pictures ready to do the back cover and came across this one which I really like.  Probably not suitable for the back cover though.

A lot going on 20190926

Did not have a good night last night, probably because it was a new place.  I felt tired this morning but managed to get to Buddha Garden.  It feels like a long cycle ride but I think I will get used to it.  Otherwise I will try and get an electric bike.

Rajan has already moved his family and moved the office wifi in readiness for the building work.  We even had time to walk around the garden and make some plans – this included plans for beds between the fruit trees as pictured. 

After work I went to the Town Hall and got the money sorted out for the building work.  Also went to the Archives to talk about what I need for the report I am going to write.  Felt tired and stomach a bit upset this afternoon but have just sent the necessary link to the person  who is going to do the book layout and printing.

As usual I feel tired rather than exultant but I am pleased that the book is  finished.

New home 20190925

I have finished editing the book and moved today to Vivek’s house.  The room is really beautiful and the house is close to everything.  Yoga class just across the road.  Shop just a short cycle ride away.  Its really, really lovely.

It feels very much as if a new cycle has finally begun

moving tomorrow 20190924

Suddenly everything is happening!  We saw Joseph today and tomorrow I am moving to Vivek’s so that Rajan can move into my place.  Suddenly there seems such a lot of upheaval and I am going to have to be very focused if I am going to get the book done soon.

Had to sit through a very boring meeting this morning.  It really is not my thing as it felt like I had to go into a different universe.

The picture is one I did for the book this morning.  It shows in diagram form how to bring all the elements of food growing together under the light of the sun and using our internal light of our awareness and understanding.  I am very pleased with it.

Keeping on 20190923

I finished the final edit today although I still have the appendices to do, only one of which needs to be revised to any great degree. 

I also need to sort out the illustrations as I’ve got to put them in separate files for the person who is going to do the layout.  I’ve also got several illustrations to work on including what I think is the most important one. So still a lot of fiddling around to do.

I’m going to focus this week on finishing all these jobs so I can send the book for layout.  It gives me a headache thinking I might actually be finishing!

I feel things are moving 20190922

Managed to get another chapter edited today and have written to the person who is going to do the layout.  I’m going to try and finish it by the end of next week.  I’ve still got four appendices and the back cover to do and also some illustrations.  Lets see.  If it takes two weeks it will be OK.

I also did a video today and realize that there has been a gap of four weeks.  I must get a bit more organized for next year and try to have some videos in hand.  Or maybe do it once every two weeks…… or shorter videos.

The picture is of a display at the Visitors Centre for the Climate strike and Earth Day yesterday.

SO busy 20190921

I feel like I haven’t done much creative work but in fact I have done the final edit on two chapters which is really good.  I feel that I have got the momentum for it and could finish it maybe as soon as next week.  I am wondering if I should just focus on that to get it finished and out there where it needs to be.

I am starting to feel a bit pressured as I have to do the video tomorrow which is bound to be slow because its some time since I’ve done one.  But there were some interesting things happened last week and in any case I want to get into the rhythm of doing the videos again.

Much of today I have been busy with Vasantha clearing out ants from various places in cupboards and trunks.  I hope I will sleep better tonight now the beds and its environs are properly clean and ant free. 

The tricucle that wasn't 20190920

Managed to get the notes and letters finished and edit another chapter.  I think I should focus on the editing this next week.  All the paperwork and stuff has been sorted out for the building work so lets hope we can start that soon.

The picture is of an electric tricycle that we tried out for taking our goods to market.  We all found it quite difficult to ride after being on two wheels.  When I came back from the UK it had disappeared so I guess no one wanted to ride it.  A four wheel vehicle would probably suit us better.

Sun is getting closer 20190919

More sun that yesterday!

A very busy day when we had a meeting for which I have now got to write notes and draft letters.  I think I have to limit the number of meetings to one per week as the only way of cutting down on admin work.

I did another chapter of editing and went to another yoga class.

Bit of a struggle 20190918

So much to do! Spent the morning running around doing all the paperwork so we can start the building.  This afternoon I spent catching up on admin work and very pleased I managed to finish.  Very pleased that I did my writing before all the admin work despite being so busy.

Maybe the sun is coming through in my consciousness like this sun coming through the clouds this morning in the picture.  After the huge rain yesterday it was grey and damp and very humid today.

Have to be careful 20190917

The work is building up and I can see that I have to be careful not to fall back into my old work habits.  I’m writing this late afternoon because I had a meeting this morning (gruesome) as well as quite a lot of email deriving from a Buddha Garden meeting this morning.

The picture is of our ploughed up path in the cashew orchard.  We are ploughing around the trees to get rid of the weeds but the tractor driver ploughed up the path!  I was really annoyed as with this afternoon’s rain all the loose soil will be washed away. 

Perhaps a new path is needed in the cashew orchard as well as for me.

Back in the grove 20190916

Got up in time to go to work despite the alarm not working for some reason.  We had a group of 30 students come from a school in Kolkatta.  They were a really good crowd.  They weren’t too excitable and did what they were asked to do without any fuss.  I enjoyed having them.

Managed to get some writing done although I didn’t get around to continuing with the last edit on the book.  Not sure I will manage it tomorrow either as I’ve got a meeting in the morning.  I’m starting to feel more of an imperative to get on and finish the book so the layout and then the printing can be done.  There’s some more things I need to look over like the appendices and list of relevant websites. 

Still tired! 20190915

The rain and probably jetlag kept me awake last night so have felt rather tired today.  Again have managed to focus on my own writing and am very pleased with something I have rewritten for the book.  Despite not wanting to start looking at the edits I did.  And then got the idea for a rewrite which says what I want to say.  Although I suppose it can always be improved.

I also went out and took pictures as I will have to get back into doing videos this next week.  After talking to Rajan about plans for doing things in Buddha Garden I felt very tired.  I still need more rest I think to get over the journey.

Second meeting 20190914

I seem to be getting back into things rather quickly with another meeting this morning.  Which again generated work and another report that I have to do.

Even with writing up the meeting notes (but not the report) I have managed to focus on my own writing, which I am pleased about.

With all the rain everything is a vibrant green

First meeting 20190913

For the first time since I came back I woke up in time to go to work.  Very miserable grey drizzly day at first.  Picked some beans and then had to go to a meeting – another first.  Very pleased with how the tablet functioned taking notes.  Also very pleased how I was able to use it for doing some writing while I was waiting for the meeting to start.  I think this writing might be the main way I use it – I hope so.

As a result of the meeting a substantial report has to be written and it looks like I am going to be the one to do it.

The rain has brought on what I call ‘a crown of cacti’.  These will all eventually grow into new cacti.

Still tired 20190912

Didn’t get up in time to go to work so didn’t go.

Still feel rather tired and glassy eyed.  I hope it changes soon.

Same but different 20190911

Everything is very green because there has been some good rain while I have been away.  Although it was more like Manchester rain today first thing in the morning.  Despite everything looking the same it seems there have been/will be a lot of changes.  Sivakala is leaving at the end of the month and Mani and Suanne have disappeared and no one knows when they are coming back.

Had a good talk with everyone and spent a lot of the afternoon setting up my new tablet exactly how I want it.  My computer crashed again and I think I will have to have it seen to as I do not want to be worried about losing some of my writing.  It was lovely to be able to use my camera again.  I have really missed it.

Still feeling very tired.

Journeying 20190910

Journey went without hiccups but I got hardly any sleep.  Which meant I turned up in Auroville feeling really, really tired.  It was a good feeling being back.

The picture is of Dubai airport where I had a short layover.

Miserably wet 20190909

Woke up to a typical Manchester rainy day.  Rain not too hard but persistent.  Got all the jobs done although I made a mistake with washing the bedding.  When the machine was finished I pressed a button which started the wash again.  Didn’t have a clue about how to stop it so had to leave it to carry on with the cycle and eventually for Davey to deal with.  As I said to him, at least the bedding will be very clean.

Although my bag was not so full it was very heavy.  Despite that I managed to get it down to the train station and get the train to the airport.  Which is not very far so its really not worth getting a taxi to the airport.  Although once there I did have to change into dry clothes.

I found the security checks really tedious but of course they are necessary so….. and then it was off back to India.

Getting ready to go 20190908

Felt very cold this morning at 9C which was not helped by the living room door having come open last night.  Started by doing a lot of admin stuff on my computer and realizing that once again I am prioritizing this over my writing work.  Hope I will be able to eventually change this.

Went to Tesco on Sunday where I spent rather too much money on another SD card for my new tablet.  Then sent to Emma’s church and we went back to her house for lunch and then supper.  When I got back I started packing and it doesn’t look as if my bag will be too full.

Dosai express 20190907

Went out shopping with Emma and managed to buy the rest of what I needed to take back to India.  Then with Davey and Alice we all went to the Dosai Express again for lunch.  Once again I didn’t get any pictures.

Managed to get a rest after lunch and then realized that I needed to send off the stuff to Mary that I brought from India.  Am very glad I did as it would have added a lot of stress to tomorrow morning if I had tried to do it then.  It was a long walk and the wrapping up took a long time.  As it was I got it to the counter with about five minutes to spare before they closed.  The picture is of the very long Manchester street along which I walked there and back.

Then enjoyed some of Davey’s soup and had a long conversation which has given me the idea for another story.

Back to Manchester 20190906

Came back to Manchester on a funny little train from Sheffield that seemed to stop everywhere.  But it was cheap!

The temperature has gone down and I feel very cold. 

The picture is of Sam playing hide and seek in Elizabeth’s house.  He is very good at it and is able to hide in plain site but not be seen.  Very clever.  Usually Elsie can’t wait to be found and will call out if she thinks I am overlooking her.

To Halifax 20190905

Went to see my brother in Halifax. This involved going to Leeds, where it was noticeably colder, and changing trains. Had a really lovely time in Halifax being shown around all the old buildings which included the Piece Hall which used to be the market place for cloth weavers. It’s been beautifully refurbished and is now home to a lot of little shops and cafes.

On the way back I realised how tired I am with all the traveling. Took a taxi from the station to make sure I was back in time to take Alex and Rachael to a delightful north African restaurant serving humous, falafels and other similar delights.

Back to Sheffield 20190904

Got up early to organise myself and began by taking Lesley’s bike to the bike shop to be mended. Last night she wheeled it over glass on the way back from our lovely meal and got a puncture. Walking back down Golbourne Road to the bus stop I stopped at some public toilets.  I was very taken with how these modern and clean toilets had retained the Victorian tiles as can be seen in the picture.

Decided to buy the tablet and to make a promise to myself that I will be serious about my writing. I have thought of ways to help myself learn about how to write stories.

Am now in Sheffield and it feels so much more peaceful than London.

Lovely day 20190903

Started out quite early so we could go to a Sintaido session with a friend of Lesley’s in one of the beautiful private gardens near Notting Hill tube station.  I really enjoyed it and I wonder if I should take up something similar, like Chi Kung, when I get back to Auroville.

Then we went to Japan House on Kensington High Street and looked at an absolutely fabulous exhibition of paintings by Anno M a Japanese painter who has illustrated many children’s books.  I was very inspired.  I stayed on in the library and found a book by Anno that Sam would love as its all about logic.

Later I went and had a look at a cheap tablet that I think I would like.  I spoke to a really nice sales person who understood what it was I wanted and knew/could find out about everything I asked. I phoned up the Manchester shop and they have got some iPads but I don’t know how long they would last as their IOS can’t be updated.  I will have to think about what to do overnight.

Back to London 20190902

Glad that I had booked a fairly late train to London which meant I could have a fairly relaxed journey.  My seat was in the quiet coach and I must say it meant I ended up in London feeling much less hassled than I usually do traveling in an ordinary coach.

Lovely to see Lesley again who has got an exciting program sorted out for tomorrow.  The picture is of one of Lesley’s moldy lemons which I think will make a better illustration for my book than the one I’ve got.

Getting ready for school 20190901

Needed a restful morning for my back but walked to Emma’s place just after lunch.  Got very wet and cold when a shower came out of nowhere.  As the children were going crazy we took them to the park.  It was sunny when we started and pouring with rain and cold when we arrived.  Despite this we walked and scooted them round the park.  They needed hot chocolate when we got back!

After supper we spent some times putting their names on school equipment like lunch boxes.  Came back and had a nice chat with Davey.

To Amanda's 20190831

Moving to Amanda’s house today so have to clear up here.  Looked after Sam while Emma went out shopping with Elsie.  Took all my stuff from Elizabeth’s to Amanda’s in the car but for some reason I left all the food at Elizabeth’s because I was having lunch at Elizabeth’s.  This included several really heavy items which I had to carry all the way when I walked to Amanda’s.  As a result my back keeps seizing up.  How could I be so silly?  I think its because I’ve been too distracted.

Took the opportunity to start sorting all my stuff and to try and figure out how to use the new backup external drive.  Davey has been here to help but I don’t think its working how I want it to yet.

Moving soon 20190830

Last full day at the house.  The picture shows us there with me in my new jumper knitted by sister in law.  Its gorgeous and warm and how she knitted it so quickly I don’t know.

We all went shopping together and I got some more sandals and Sam some sun glasses which he wears all year round.  I hope my sandals can stand up to Indian conditions.

In the afternoon Emma Sam went climbing so I looked after Elsie.  We spent a lot of time playing with play dough although I also labeled all the new school clothes and opened all the parcels that came.  I feel I am almost ready to go back and wonder how it will feel when I get there as I feel so different.

Birthday celebrations 20190829

It was Emma’s birthday today so we all went out for a meal this evening at Chennai dosa.  I really enjoyed it.

This morning we went to one of the parks and on the way back my sandal completely fell apart.  The sole split into two and it will take a LOT of glue to repair it.  Time for a new pair I think although whether I can find something before I go back remains to be seen.  We all came back with Tom in the car so that Sam could go to swimming and then off to the birthday meal. 

To Stoke on Trent 20190828

Had a lovely day with Jean and Bob.  Jean is really frail but exudes a wonderful energy which I enjoyed sitting with.  I felt as a result I have a bit more clarity about things in my life.

When I got back and turned on one of the lights there was a crackle and spark from the fuse box and the lights went off.  Fortunately in these modern houses the electricity is on several circuits and it was only one circuit that was cut.  Phoned up my brother who sorted me out.  Apparently it happens when a light bulb goes and all I need to do is change the light bulb.  Although as the bulb in question is at the top of the stairs I think I will leave that for someone taller than me to do.

With grandchildren 20190827

Have had a lovely day looking after Elsie and Sam.  We went out to the park, made some birthday cards for Emma and enjoyed two meals together.  They are a delight to be with.  I’m so very glad that I have this place where we can be together like this.

Phoned my brother and am going to see him Thursday next week.

Bank holiday day out 20190826

Today we went to Wythenshaw Park with Emma and Elsie which I really enjoyed.  We went to the playground and a fair (where Elsie went on the Bouncy Castle) as well as looking around the walled garden.  Another lovely day but I find it so hard to stand out in the sun, although of course everyone else does and loves it.

Another walk another park 20190825

At last have done my washing as well as organized the rest of my trip which involves quite a lot of traveling.  Hopefully it will be easier than last time as I won’t be carrying so much around with me.  Had a good conversation with Bob and looking forward to seeing them on Wednesday.  When I will be able to talk about what has been going on with me for the first time and hopefully get a bit more understanding.

Hot day (by English standards) so walked to a park along a cycle path which was lovely and cool. I have got very Indian and prefer to keep out of the sun rather than bask in the sun like everyone else.  Had a lovely day.

Over the hump 20190824

Feel much better today and as if I am allowing life to flow through me again.  The eating and stomach is better helped by a pasta meal that Emma cooked me last night.

I feel I have gone over a hump and am now allowing life to flow within me again.

It was a lovely day and we had a good trip to the park. After which we did things in Emma’s house altogether.  This included painting with Elsie which I enjoyed as well.  This was my picture.

Have got to organize the rest of my stay.

Jumping 20190823

Had a really good time going to Jump Heaven which is a trampoline place although they also have some slides and soft play areas well.  Was surprised how much the trampolines made me feel a bit dizzy but how some yoga asanas made that much better!  I loved it.

Realized that somehow I am cutting myself off from life.  Do I want to live or die?  I think I have to decide. 

We also bought some new school uniforms which is what they are wearing in the picture.

New home 20190822

Yesterday came back to Manchester to Elizabeth’s house.  Its so wonderful to be on my own again!  Having the house enables me to look after the children which I really enjoyed today.  We did just simple things together like shopping and cooking lunch but it was really lovely to be able to do it in my ‘own’ space.

Also enabled me to cook rice which will hopefully help my stomach which is not getting any better.