Star pineapple

I came across this in our pineapple patch - its the start of a new pineapple.  I thought the shape and colour and how it looked in the morning light was beautiful.

 Unfortunately the light doesn't come across well in the picture which I took on my tablet - which doesn't allow me to change the exposure etc.  So I will wait until I get my new camera (my old one died several weeks ago and can't be resuscitated) and then try again.

In the meantime it will be very interesting to watch the pineapples grow.

How I felt when the sun came out

A few days ago we had a very unexpected grey rainy day and were very lucky that in the following few days the sun returned.  This is a picture of what I felt when it returned.

There was something very simple and comforting about both the warmth and the sunlight after all that greyness.  I really understand why people worship the sun and I think I was doing it as well.

An interpretation of Buddha Garden

One of our volunteers is an art therapist and went to an art therapy workshop this weekend.  She has put up this picture on the notice board of how Buddha Garden feels to her.  

She said it is of the water trickling down through the earth.  I told her that it could equally well be the energy she has put into Buddha Garden while she is here and now it will stay here and help Buddha Garden to grow.

It struck me that the picture reminds me of aboriginal art. Then I remembered that for the last few years she has been living in Australia and this is where she has learnt to be an art therapist.

The sun is back

After yesterday's grey and rainy day the sun was back today and it made such a difference.

Pierre used the new soil sieve today and while Cedric was sieving the soil Pierre pointed out how it caught the sun.  

Beautiful.

Grey

Unexpected rain today and it is very grey.  So grey that the pump won't work with the solar panels.  Which is a pity because the tank got emptied last night - I forgot to turn off the water properly.  I feel so bad about it because it affects everyone staying here as well as me.

So I am collecting water in a bucket - which is actually giving me more than I thought even if it is a bit of a funny colour.

Pensive

This was one of those pictures that just came.  I had no idea what I was going to do and this just emerged from my doodling around.  I think it exemplifies how today has been - a day when I have actually had some time to just sit and dream.  Not that I could put any words to my dreams and thoughts and there have been no big insights or anything like that.  Despite several people coming and wanting somewhere to stay and having to talk to someone I still feel this has been a day where I have had lots of space.

I have had more time than usual to do the picture (it was very annoying that I couldn't think of anything to do and just doodled!) and I have also done a lot of reading.  Hopefully this has allowed me to take in some energy.

Three mothers

Today I got a call out of the blue from the mother of someone that I helped to look after in Buddha Garden several years ago.  He had mental health problems and we tried to look after him but failed as we didn't have the capacity to deal with his very deep seated problems.  Eventually he had to go back to his home country.

She phoned to say that she had this big picture of Mother and would I like it?  Generally I don't like that sort of thing but as it was offered I said 'yes' although as the picture shows I don't have enough wall anywhere on which to hang it.  It is one of the Cartier Bresson pictures which has been beautifully mounted and framed.

When she came over we had a long chat about what was going on with her son.  Things are obviously very difficult for him and she feels helpless.  There was a lot of crying but I think that it did help her to talk to me about the situation.  It seems there is no one else here that she feels she can talk to and it is a very lonely experience to face such a situation on your own.  I think I will write to him as even if he cannot reply at least he will know there is someone thinking of him.

As we were talking she said there were three mothers - his actual mother, me who mothered him for two years or more, and Mother who set up Auroville.

My shoulder doesn't hurt

At last I have had time to make a picture - this time to celebrate the return of my left shoulder.  For the last few days it has been hurting although I am not quite sure why.  Sitting and typing tended to make it worse and resting didn't make it any better.  It seemed to be something I had done to my soft tissue - maybe one of the asanas that I did in yoga.  This was another reason why I could not understand why I was moving furniture around last night and I thought it would probably make it worse rather than better.

Yet I got up this morning and was SO pleased to feel that the pain had gone and I could move my shoulder easily.  I nice present for Mother's birthday today.

Furniture moving

I have been so busy these last two days that yesterday I was too tired and didn't have time to do a picture.  Why then, today, do I suddenly find the time to rearrange my room and move all my furniture?  I am no less busy or tired today!

I had got a bit fed up with my bed being on the hottest side of the room which means that I can't have my afternoon nap there.  I have managed to rearrange everything so that the bed is now back on the cooler side of the room together with all my writing and art work activities.

During the moving around I had to turn off and disconnect the wifi and now find most annoyingly that it isn't working.  Those sorts of things seem so delicate here.  You set them up and then mustn't disturb them if you want them to go on working!  Which is why I had to post the picture later as I needed the wifi to transfer it from my tablet to my computer.

students and a wonderful gift

We had eighteen students from the Singapore American school come this morning.  Despite the fact that nearly all of them had never done this sort of activity before they all worked very well and were focused and well behaved.  Those who were bored while I did my talk were very quietly bored so those who wanted to listen could do so.

I have not been feeling very well but realised last night that I have probably got amoebas.  I realised that I have had diarrhoea for some time and my stomach has been getting increasingly painful.  I started my usual herbal regime and today feel better although still a bit weak.  I was quite worried this morning with having the students come but with the help of some of the volunteers with student experience and with the students being so good everything was fine.

At the end of the session one of the teachers gave me a donation of $100 for the new kitchen.  Sivakala surpassed herself with doing an idlie breakfast for everyone so he understood very well why we need the new kitchen.

I am very grateful.

Sooooooooooo tired!

I have got to the point where I have been forced to stop.  Yesterday I worked very intensively doing extra notes for one of the regular meetings I go to as well as plethora of other things that needed doing.  Then I went to yoga where we did some very energetic moves where I pushed myself far too hard.  At the end of the lesson I felt so dizzy I had to get a taxi back because I was too dizzy to ride my bike.  The whole week has been very busy and with two late nights I guess it was just too much for me.

Once I got back I didn't feel too bad, but today I have felt very fragile.  I worked this morning and tried to get a rest this afternoon, but didn't really manage it.  Sri turned up with her baby and I didn't have the energy to really deal with her.  She felt depressed to me and kept talking about how she can't feed either herself or her child and wants to get a job.  I just felt overwhelmed by her and don't know the best way to help.  

As I write this I feel soooooooooooooo tired.  I have started taking vitamin B and ashwaghanda and this next week will try to get to bed by 8.00pm every night.  Or at least stop work by then and spend an hour or two reading or doing something very quiet.  In a few weeks time I will try to get a weekend away as its the only way I get a complete rest.

My lovely pillow!

This is my new pillow which I thought at first might be too large and puffy to be comfortable.  How wrong I could be!  In fact it is very comfortable to use and my neck and upper back are already feeling a lot better.

It is only now my neck is feeling better that I realise how much it used to ache and how uncomfortable it made me feel.  And such a simple solution.

From one season to the next...

Today we planted our first seedlings of bassella spinach, hot season crop.  

I can feel the temperature rising as I didn't need my quilt last night, only a very thin cotton cover.

I feel as if I am on a cusp as the cool season blends into the next hot season.

Over a hump

It was a difficult day today which - in the end - turned out all right.  I spent the work time being really worried about having to go to the negotiation and when I got there one person hadn't turned up.  This meant that the negotiation couldn't take place but it gave the three of us who were there a chance to share our concerns.  It was a good discussion where we focused on the most positive way of moving forward and I came away feeling much lighter.  I have to accept people as they are and where they are try to support the positive rather than the negative. I think we came up with a good way to do this.

The picture is of Sam who I think has been having his own little hump but this - we think - is probably involving his back teeth coming through.  He keeps waking up at night so poor Emma is involved as well.  But in the picture he looks happier so hopefully he is making his way through it.

I had a lovely time in the evening when I went shopping for a new pillow and chappels and then had a birthday meal with Pieter and Michael.  Delightful.

Map

This is the 'visual' I did today to show where we are having problems with encroachment in Buddha Garden. The 'new' one, which isn't actually new but which we have at last decided to do something about, is the red at the end of Buddha Garden around our wood lot.  The original fence has disappeared and as a result cows and people are walking across criss crossed paths.  What is worse is that it is also becoming a drinking spot. There is a also a problem with the person on the next plot who maintains that we have put the fence in the wrong place.  This means we will need a survey before we put the fence up.

As if I haven't got enough jobs to do ......

Tired

I have been so tired today and when I came back from yoga I was completely bereft of any ideas about anything - especially anything that could be turned into a picture.  I was seriously contemplating giving today a miss.

Then Emma sent me this picture of Sam just about to burst into tears.  He has been waking up very early so poor Emma is very tired as well.  I guess it must be his teeth as its about time that the back ones will be coming through.  

Some lovely colours and shapes

I feel it has been a relentless day of hard work.  I didn't go to my dance class because I didn't see how I could fit it in.  

It was nearly sunset when I was looking around for a picture and I just couldn't think of anything.  Then when I went across to get my food from the fridge I noticed the colours and shapes of some of the lettuces we are growing. They looked very interesting and beautiful.  I rushed back and got my new tablet (my camera doesn't work anymore) and there was just enough light to take a few pictures.  

It wasn't the best conditions to take pictures, especially with the tablet which only has a very basic camera.  Not surprisingly the pictures didn't do justice to the shapes and colours, so that will have to wait for another day, better light and more time.  Although whether I will be able to have all those things any time soon remains to be seen. 

Late cards

This comes from a lovely birthday card that Noemie got me which was drawn by someone called Tejubehan from a book called 'Drawing from the City'.  I really love it and it is now my wallpaper.

Yesterday I received a Christmas card from a friend in the UK which is only two months late!!!  Looks like all my cards are late this year.

Another very busy day when I have written the monthly report for the Farm group, gone to a wedding and done a lot of other jobs.  Yet I still have more to do......

Hard work!

Today I have been doing the notes for the meeting I went to yesterday.  I feel as if I have been sitting in a little bubble all day and that the world has been passing me by.  The lovely weather, the people coming and everything else going on while I keep my nose to the grindstone.   I feel if I don't get this work done now there isn't a chance that I will have time to do it after Monday.  

Despite this we had a lovely lunch (a special all organic meal which is a fund raiser for our new kitchen) when I was so happy to see Pieter and Michael who are looking very well.  We are all going out together on Thursday.  I had a lovely birthday meal last night with Noemie and Vivek although I was a bit tired after the meeting.

February 8th

A declaration I like

I saw this on Facebook and really, really liked it.  I hope eventually I will do my own version.

Tidy

This morning Rajan and I were able to tidy up all the plastic pipe that has been lying around for so long.  I am really, really pleased with how the pipe stand works.  

The wind turbine returns!

Finally, finally after many months our wind turbine has been returned.  It had to be sent away because one of the parts inside it wasn't working properly so it wasn't making very much electricity.  Lets hope it can be put back up quickly while the wind is still blowing as it only blows for six months of the year.  I think some other gizmo is needed, which costs yet more money, to make it work properly, but lets see.  

I love the way that Pierre has put it up at the bottom of his steps. It looks to me like we should get all the volunteers to come and blow on it to make it go round!

This time last year!

I have been going through all my blog posts as I am going to turn the first 365 of them into a book.  I was amused to see that this is what I did for the same date last year.  In many ways it is just the same now, with a lot of people coming and wanting to talk to me, come to Buddha Garden etc etc.  I happen to feel more calm today than I did last year, but I think it is because this day last year was particularly busy.  We also have fewer volunteers although there is going to be a big change over of people this week.

I am rather enjoying do this and hope that by reviewing all the pictures I will get ideas for my painting.  Which was partly the reason for doing this in the first place although it also makes a very good diary.

The Spider

This morning I spent some time going through a lot of my papers - a continuation of all the clearing up and moving around I did yesterday.  I came across this picture I created in 2003 of the spider that healed my broken heart.  When Shantam died I felt as if someone had plunged a sword into my heart and that it would never heal.  

Some time later I had this very strong image of a little spider - one of many that I saw in Buddha Garden - coming and spinning a web and sewing up my heart.

It did help me feel better and as I looked at the picture this morning I remembered those times and felt very warm towards that spider and all the other spiders that I still see in Buddha Garden.

Moving stuff around

I don't know whether it was because it was Chinese New Year, or listening to Germaine Greer on Woman's Hour talking about her archive (which she has sold for A$3million!) or all the trouble I had with David's papers when he died. Or maybe it was just that I wanted to rearrange my room as in the picture so that I now have space for painting.

This morning and a lot of the afternoon I have been sorting out all my papers which includes all my diaries and pictures.  I had to throw out a huge amount of stuff (mostly non paper) because everything in the trunk where I keep it had got wet and moldy.  This despite the fact that I had wrapped up most of the stuff in plastic.  Originally I thought I would send most of the stuff to Emma, but I think I could actually digitize a lot of it.  Many of the diaries are already digitized and I would only have to scan and photograph the pictures and Rajan said he would help me with that so it wouldn't be too much of a job.

There are a number of diaries from when I was in Kodaikanal that are not in digital format as well as letters that I sent to Shantam and which he sent to me when he was in Africa and later in Kodaikanal.  I just can't bear to look at them and don't want to scan them and neither do I want to give them to someone else to scan as I would hate anyone else to look at and possibly read them.  If I send them to Emma and Rachael I don't want them looked at until after I am gone.  I did come across some nice things I did though, that again aren't in digital format but which somehow concentrate a lot of the writing and painting that I did over the years.

I will sort out what really needs to be sent tomorrow.